"How you got him is how you will lose him."
"Love is dead, I want to die. My heart is broken." While another innocent man was senselessly shot by police yesterday, the newsfeed was dominated by varied sentiment on the ending of the "Brangelina" era. I have to admit that when I heard the news my heart sunk a bit too. Celebrities or not they are human beings. We root for love and project our hopes, dreams and fantasies as well as our fears, phobias and disillusionment on other people's relationships. "The Notebook" and "Cinderella" stories seem to be the default or ideal love story in our psyche and anything outside of that looks like failure in the love life department. But is that really fair? THE HOLY GRAIL Years ago a gentlemen asked me if I was married and I said "no." He further asked if I ever was and I said "yes." In fact I went on to say that I believe every intimate relationship is a marriage. He offered his apology and said "I'm sorry it failed." I said "but it didn't. It was one of the greatest experiences of my life, we are still close and I grew in such profound ways so I feel that the union was a great success." Just because a couple chooses to redefine their relationship doesn't mean that it's a failure. Just because a couple stays together for fifty years doesn't mean that the union was "successful." Many people view a walk down the aisle as the holy grail and staying together no matter what as successful. I've asked the question "Do You Really Want A Ring On It" to explore this notion. GROW & EVOLVE I agree with Jujumama's Kenya and Carl Stevens that the purpose of relationships are for growth and personal evolution and not necessarily to get love because ideally we already identify ourselves as love and are already in a love relationship with ourselves. When it comes to relationships, marriage, partnership, union there is no "one size fits all" template. Each person comes to this life unique with a specific life's purpose, mission, lesson and how we experience and express those things are one-of-a-kind. Our complexities don't neatly fit in a box. Whether you're celibate, single, married, divorced, widowed, it's complicated, open relationship, monogamous, polygamous, polyandrous, for seventy-two hours or seventy-two years it's perfect for YOU. So it's not really fair or accurate to believe that all people have to have "The Notebook" or "Cinderella" template to constitute success in love. ULTIMATE UNION I really feel that what we're each really looking for us the ultimate union within - our perfect expression of feminine and masculine within. Two flames becoming one to create a greater flame - power couple. I realized recently that it doesn't make sense to put absolute trust in human beings because at the end of the day we are - human. And that although it looks an awful lot like it, the REAL relationship isn't with him, her, them . . . human beings. The relationship I have with another is the relationship I have with the Omnipotent, the Omniscient, the Omnipowerful Creator of all things within ME. POWER COUPLES + THREESOMES I am already in the ultimate power couple relationship with the Divine. God is my boo, my bae, my Beloved. I'm the first lady of the All. How do I do that? My love affair is with the expression of Good, Life, Love guided by the laws of the Universe - Maat. This union becomes polyandrous when I share the energy of this union with everyone I come in contact with including the man at my side. He becomes the beneficiary of that love, the vessel through which I rendezvous with the Divine: The ULTIMATE Threesome. It's a BIG IDEA right? Try it on. The only possible failure in relationship I see is coming out of any relationship the same as you went in because that means you didn't grow or evolve. If you're not growing you're dying. So I say let's dive in to every union, partnership, marriage willing to do what it takes to graduate to the next adventure whether it's with one or multiple teachers. ♡ ☆ ♀ Akua Day 21 of 9/13 Moons Waning Gibbous |
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